Withnail and I

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Plot – Withnail and “I” – the narrator – are two aspiring actors and friends who are looking for a job in London without success. They are flat broke,so they move to the house of Withnail’s uncle in the countryside. The man is rich and homosexual and he tries to persuade them,but he gives up because he’s convinced there’s something between them. Back in London,they find out that a drug dealer has set himself up in their house. When they decide to change life,one of them gets a role. It’s a hilarious movie that makes fun of the Shakespeare’s myth in a refined way.

Movie Info

Title Withnail and I

Original title Withnail & I

Year 1987

Director Bruce Robinson

GenreDrama, Comedy

Top 22 Quotes of “Withnail and I” Movie

“- … & I: We’re leaving in half an hour.
– Withnail: Half an hour? Don’t be ridiculous. I need at least an hour for lunch.”

Paul McGann – … & I
Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“Even a stopped clock gives the right time twice a day. And for once I’m inclined to believe that Withnail is right. We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell. Making an enemy of our own future. What we need is harmony, fresh air, stuff like that.”

Paul McGann – … & I

“Flowers are essentially tarts. Prostitutes for the bees. There is, you’ll agree, a certain ‘je ne sais quoi’ oh so very special about a firm, young carrot.”

Richard Griffiths – Monty

“- Monty: You’re going to finish the vegetables.
– Withnail: I don’t know how to do them.
– Monty: Well, of course you don’t, you are incapable of indulging in anything but pleasure, am I not right? You don’t deserve such loyalty. Now, come along, I’m going to teach you how to peel a potato.”

Richard Griffiths – Monty
Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!”

Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“A coward you are, Withnail! An expert on bulls you are not!”

Paul McGann – … & I

“- Withnail: Monty used to act.
– Monty: Well, I’d hardly say that. It’s true, I crept the boards in my youth. But I never really had it in my blood, and that’s what’s so essential, isn’t it, theatrical zeal in the veins. Alas I have little more than vintage wine and memories.”

Richard R. Grant – Withnail
Richard Griffiths – Monty

“We want the finest wines available to humanity. And we want them here, and we want them now!”

Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“This is a device enabling the drunken driver to operate in absolute safety. You fill this with piss, take this pipe down the trouser and sellotape this valve to the end of the old chap. Then you get horribly drunk and they can’t fucking touch you. According to these instructions, you refuse everything but a urine sample. You undo your valve and…”

Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“Speed is like a dozen transatlantic flights without ever getting off the plane. Time change. You lose, you gain. Makes no difference so long as you keep taking the pills. But sooner or later you’ve got to get out because it’s crashing, and then all at once those frozen hours melt out through the nervous system and seep out the pores.”

Paul McGann – … & I

“We get in there and get wrecked, then we’ll eat a pork pie, then we’ll drop a couple of Surmontil-50’s each. That means we’ll miss out Monday but come up smiling Tuesday morning.” Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“- Withnail: I’ve some extremely distressing news.
– … & I: I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to hear anything. Oh God, it’s a nightmare, I tell you, it’s a nightmare.
– Withnail: We’ve just run out of wine. What are we gonna do about it?
– … & I: I don’t know, I don’t know. Oh God, I don’t feel good. My thumbs have gone weird! I’m in the…”

Richard R. Grant – Withnail
Paul McGann – … & I

“Look at that, accident black spot! These aren’t accidents! They’re throwing themselves into the road gladly! Throwing themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness!” Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“- Marwood: If my father was loaded I’d ask him for some money.
– Withnail: If your father was my father you wouldn’t get it.”

Paul McGann – … & I
Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“I don’t advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hair are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.”

Ralph Brown – Danny

“- Danny: My partner’s got a really good idea for making dolls. His name’s Presuming Ed. His sister give him the idea. She got a doll on Christmas that pisses itself. Then you gotta change its diapers for it. It’s horrible really but they like that, the little girls. So we’re gonna make one that shits itself as well.
– Withnail: Shits itself?
-…”

Ralph Brown – Danny
Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“- … & I: Give me a Valium, I’m getting the fear!
– Danny: You have done something to your brain. You have made it high. If I lay 10 mls of diazepam on you, it will do something else to your brain. You will make it low. Why trust one drug and not the other?”

Paul McGann – … & I
Ralph Brown – Danny

“There must and shall be aspirin!” Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“- Danny: The joint I’m about to roll requires a craftsman. It can utilise up to 12 skins. It is called a Camberwell Carrot.
– … & I: It’s impossible to use 12 papers on one joint.
– Danny: It’s impossible to make a Camberwell Carrot with anything less.
– Withnail: Who says it’s a Camberwell Carrot?
– Danny: I do. I invented it in Camberwell,…”

Ralph Brown – Danny
Paul McGann – … & I
Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“Jesus, look at that. Apart from a raw potato, that’s the only solid to have passed my lips in the last 60 hours. I must be ill.” Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“- … & I: You never discuss your family do you?
– Withnail: I fail to see my family’s of any interest to you. I’ve absolutely no interest in yours. I dislike relatives in general and in particular mine.”

Paul McGann – … & I
Richard R. Grant – Withnail

“How can it be so cold in here? It’s like Greenland in here. We’ve got to get some booze. It’s the only solution to this intense cold. Something’s got to be done. We can’t go on like this. I’m a trained actor reduced to the status of a bum.” Richard R. Grant – Withnail